Feminist and Misogynist.

“Why are you a misogynist?”

“What? I am not a misogynist, why would you say that?” I replied, amazed by the sudden accusation made towards me.

“I think you are an anti-woman.” She continued to put her thoughts forward.

“I am not against women, I treat them the same way I treat men. Both are equal in my understanding, well almost equal.”

“That is not how you should treat a girl. Girls think very different from how boys think!”

“I will agree on that part, we are very different”, I smirked making a sarcastic remark, hoping she wouldn’t get it, and she didn’t disappoint me.

“I have seen you making remarks about girls, saying that they behave in strange ways. You should respect women. We have tolerated for a very long time, and now we should be treated equal.”

I knew that I had sparked a fire in the conversation.

“To be honest, girls do not use their brains when they have to, they are always living in a fantasy world of some sort. I say to you and all the others, come back to earth and face the reality!”

If I could portray an emoji for her reaction it has to be the one with the red face. She continued not to back down.

“You are constantly telling that women should be more responsible, but then there are things that we cannot do, like being physical and lifting heavy weights, that is a man’s job. I can accept that, but we should stop having words like chairman, mankind, and spokesman. Instead, we should be using words like chairperson, humankind and spokesperson.”

“Oh please, suddenly you are against words, what kind of sick idea is that. See, I told you, where you need to apply brain, you don’t. You are worried about changing words.” I remarked with a good comeback, hoping that she will back down. But, she didn’t.

“Again the same topic, you are not treating women with respect. That is not how you should talk to a girl. Your tone is rude to me, and its hurting.”

There is no comeback from this. Spinning around the same topic all the time. I stood up to leave but I -remarked one last time – “If you want respect, you need to earn it. Don’t demand it. You can continue to live in your fantasy world while I have to go to office.”

“What do you want for dinner today?” she asked with genuine concern.

“Some Italian would be great. Bye, and I love you”

“Love you too.”

Inspired by George Carlin's stand up comedy.

My Choice.

So these people are at it again. One video has created massive outrage throughout the country and every keyboard warrior is out on the streets of the internet mocking, spreading hateful messages and ridiculing Deepika. They are making their voices heard and stamping their authority to say that this video is wrong in so many levels and dimensions. There was a news too where a man was found peeing in public and he was heard stating that that was his choice.

Freedom of speech is granted by the constitution, but you don’t go and abuse your father do you? Do you challenge the constitution of India and demand that you should have a right to abuse whoever you want? You don’t.

“It is my choice if I want to have sex outside of marriage”- this is the statement that has hauled every so called lunatic out of his shell and onto the streets. Men can’t take it if women start to rise and say things like this. In this country women are not equal to men, I agree to that. Women are not equal to men. They are far superior in the aspects of life.

It’s has always been about men in this world. The history, the evolution, the wars, the destruction, the guns, the murders, the drugs, the killing and the mayhem on this planet we call ‘Mother Earth’. Have you ever given it a thought as to why it is mother earth and not father earth? It’s plain and simple- had it been a male he would have destroyed himself long time back. It’s the patience of the women that is tested time and again and on multiple occasions. These male chauvinists who claim that women are being given too much liberty should go fuck themselves.

It’s always been about dicks to these men. The bigger dick will rule the world. USA bombing other countries, just to prove that they have bigger dicks. They tried it with Russia, but hey, Russians have big dicks too, so they started a cold war. Everywhere it has been these men who have created violence and destruction in the life of other humans. All the wars till date have been fought primarily by men. The evilest men that this earth has seen have been men, be it Hitler or Stalin. So why the sense of pride if I may ask? Why is there a bloated ego that you are a man and you have a right to do things? Well, for your information, you don’t.

Let’s come to the topic of women empowerment. Most of you would have never heard about Maggie Doyne. Look up in Wikipedia, you will know about her. She is an American citizen living in Nepal. She had opened an orphanage there to take care of the orphans who had no one to support them after the civil war. She started with the orphanage, now she has a school where there are around fifty students. She has a health clinic too. She helps women by teaching them the art of sewing. She teaches them to be independent and self-reliant. She teaches them to read and write in English. Together these women are learning the art of doing something useful that can not only help themselves but also their families. This is called empowerment. These women who would have otherwise not done anything are now learning ways of life.

Women empowerment is not a video by Vogue. Vogue magazine that portrays slim, well maintained female models showing their body, cannot be the source of empowerment. Empowerment refers to increasing the spiritual, political, social or economic strength of individuals and communities. It does not refer to the flaunting of sexuality. It does not mean wearing a set of clothes, having sex with someone, returning home late. To be frank no one should be even awake at four in the morning let alone returning from somewhere.

The video is an effort to say that women have their choice in terms of sexuality and sex. It has nothing to do with empowerment and it has nothing to do with the people endorsing it. So to the men who think that a women cannot do what she pleases, well neither can you. So stop poking your dick in others matter. My point is that people are being made role models for things that they do not support and feel. Wrong people are being put on TV for wrong things, and we need to stop that. On the other hand being men, we need to say to our dicks- let the brain do all the thinking, you should rise for sex.

To all men, let women be empowered (see the meaning above).

To all women, empowering doesn’t mean you wear the same clothes as men and join the exact corporations that they join and ruin the lives of the others making money and going after materialistic items. Be different. Sexuality is not democracy. You can be more.

Deepika- do shampoo and moisturizer advertisements, don’t make a fool out of yourself coming on youtube and saying you support empowerment. Let’s face it. You don’t.

Maggie- you are the real hero.


Inspired by the words of George Carlin.

Sister

They thought for months and plied you would not be born,
Kept their fingers crossed and prayed to god till the candles burnt,
They tried more than once, and hoped it wasn’t you this time,
Finding the sex of the foetus is all they wanted to determine. 

They didn’t care about your first cry or the first smile,
They didn’t see your tender hands and feet so fragile,
They didn’t watch over you when you took your first steps,
All they saw was a boy’s face who had to be in your place.

Oh sister, little sister, you have a choice.
Oh sister, little sister, you have a voice.

There is no use they said when you wanted to learn,
Go to the kitchen they said, and make the woods burn,
When you started to play and have some rejoice,
They slapped you in the face and enforced you to devoice.

Oh sister, little sister, you have a choice.
Oh sister, little sister, you have a voice.

So let them try to stop you now, lay hurdles in your path,
Don’t stand down or give ever up, even if the way is black,
Take you stance and fight for your right, as there is a long way to go,
Don’t ever feel helpless and alone, even if they tell you so.

Anthony

“Only the dead have seen the end of war”, I have always regarded that a quotation has more impact than a boring dictated paragraph. Remembering Plato, I threw one of his favoured quotations to take a glimpse at the reaction of my students. They usually, just stare blank at me. Some of them stay with eyes rooted in their books, while a small portion of them stare at the wall behind me, as if the answer to all questions were inscribed there. Very few of them actually possess the optimum amount of concentration, as they are grilled by all the teachers to excel in studies.

A class full of bright students is a myth which is carried on from generations and brought forward in each class of each school and of every country. On most occasions, I am on the lookout for just a single hand that is raised or a plain nod. But, as it turned out, today was different; nobody was interested in what I was saying. It seemed the entire juice of excitement has been siphoned out by other teachers, and classes in the second half on most occasions are soporific.

Clueless faces sat on the wooden chairs, as if I had thrown in a math equation of a higher standard, at them. This was supposed to be an unconscious body language gesture for me, indicating the course of the day. So I take the textbook, close it and slam it on the table- “No lesson for today, today we hear a story. How many of you, boys and girls want to hear a story?”

Watching them the next moment was like watching a bud opening up into a flower. The life that is infused with a single word echoed is worth observing. As expected the drooping faces suddenly lit up with the sound of the word- ‘story’. They closed their books in unison and looked up towards me for a start.

As a history teacher of Kendra Vidhyalaya, I could tell them any story that I wanted to. But, I wanted them to explore their imaginations. Few things in life are more exciting than watching a young bird fly, or for that matter, the first tender step your child takes. For me, the only captivating thing is the way students explore their vivid imaginations. The ability to think and reason differently under similar circumstances is the unique characteristic of a human. I find that quite enchanting, but as time passes by, and we start to age, the answers conform being similar, and the ability to think different is a quality that is being highly sought after.

As the environment had changed to being like one in the morning, or rather as the students would feel like on a Sunday morning- I made myself available to every eye in the classroom.

“I want all of you to listen to this story, and answer me a simple question. Would you all be able to do that?”

“Yes Sir”, replied all.

Informing someone that there is a tunnel on the way gives them an element of surprise, but telling them that there is something unexpected at the end of the tunnel will get their adrenaline rushing. Everybody started thinking about the question and wondered less about the story.

“What is your ambition in life? What would you be or who do you see as your role model?”

There were discrete answers to my question. Part of the crowd wanted to be doctors, save people and help them recover from their disease. That is a great profession, where you can come directly in contact with the patients and cure them. All classes in India have aspiring doctors, if I am not wrong. That is a well-known reason for producing the best doctors in the world.

Some of them wanted to be engineers. There are so many disciplines in engineering that the students themselves are unaware of it. A couple of girls wanted to be pilots or astronauts. Some wanted to be teachers, some politicians, some police officers, some actors and finally, there were three students who had no idea what will happen to them in the future. A common thing that is haunting most students these days- lack of vision regarding ones future.

 I expected such replies and I also knew that during the course of their lives, they would change their ambitions and careers. I remember when I was young, I wanted to be a pilot, then a doctor, then an actor, and then a cricketer but, I finally managed to be a teacher. A decision that I don’t regret, and I hope I won’t in the near future also.

After collecting the required data, I began.

“Have you heard of thanksgiving?”

Once again cluelessness filled the room and I had to speak again to stop the murmurs.

“Thanksgiving is a custom in North America, most famous in United States. It is celebrated on the 2^nd week of October, every year. On this day, the entire family joins together for a hearty meal, and share the day together. A lot of time goes by for the preparation and the main recipe is a turkey.”

“Excuse me sir, what is a turkey?” asked a boy with profound innocence, while some of the students laughed at his ignorance.

“A turkey is a bird, it is larger than a chicken and it is favoured by many as better than chicken. But, it is more expensive and not so common in India.”

He thanked me and I could sense that under his breath, he was cursing himself for such a silly question.

“So, one time during thanksgiving, there was a family of the Robbins. They lived in a small town in the state of Michigan. It was thanksgiving and the entire neighbourhood was celebrating, eating their favourite ‘turkey’.”

“The father, the head of the family was John, who was jobless for quite some time and his wife, Nikki, was washing dishes in households to bear the expenses for their living. At thanksgiving they had no money to buy a turkey or even a chicken. All they ate was porridge every day. John and Nikki had two children, William and Anthony. Both of them were young, but they understood the complications their family were going through. So what was the name of the father of William and Anthony?”

“John”, said the majority of the students convincing me that they were paying attention.

“As a custom, they needed to have good food that day, but the Robbins’ had no money. The children were disappointed but they didn’t let their parents sense it. Meanwhile, Nikki was complaining all day about John and his drinking habits that got him thrown out of his job and brought them to this condition. John was cursing his luck and threatened Nikki repeatedly.”

“Both the boys watched their parents fight, but they couldn’t do anything. The racket went on for about an hour, while Nikki prepared the last porridge left in the house. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Shocked at the sudden knock, John thought that the neighbours had come in to complain of the fight and noise.”

“John, ordered Anthony to open the door. Anthony hesitated for a second, but followed his father’s command. To his surprise there was no one at the door, but lying ahead on the floor, close to his feet was freshly cooked food. He looked out to see if anyone was visible, but no one was in sight. On procuring the food delivered at the doorstep, he brought it in.”

““Who was there?” asked John in a stern voice””

““Somebody has left food for us”, said Anthony”

““Food? Why would someone bring food for us?” Commanded John”

““I don’t know dad”, replied Anthony with his pale voice.”

“Silence was common to all, as their eyes lay fixed on the food that was delivered. William wanted to make a move but he held back. He, as well as the rest of the family had grown tired of satisfying their hunger with porridge day in and day out. Anthony being the youngest of all couldn’t resist anymore and asked his dad.

““Dad, can we have this food, I am hungry””

““No, absolutely not, someone must have deliberately kept food at our doorstep to make us look petty and miserable”, said John suppressing any thoughts of eating the charitable food.”

“Meanwhile, Nikki who was watching everything from the kitchen came closer to Anthony and looked at John. She saw a shrewd man, whose bloated ego could lead their children starving even on thanksgiving.”

Amongst the serious atmosphere, where the story was taking a turn, a hand moved vertically upward with a state of confusion. I had to stop my story and tend to the immediate problem faced by the zealous, back-bencher. This was the first time he had raised his hand in my class.

“Yes Sandeep, what is your question?”

“Sir, I didn’t understand the word you mentioned before ego.”

“Did you mean bloated! You see bloated means something that is pumped or swollen up, like a balloon. Hence, bloated ego simply means his big ego or being stubborn, or notorious.”

He let me continue after a confirmative nod.

“Nikki tried to intervene and told John that this could be a sign from God and that they had to accept it as it was thanksgiving.”

“Although John was outnumbered, he still didn’t budge from his initial decision. He ordered Anthony to throw the food outside. The next few seconds of silence was awkward. Nobody spoke and everybody stared blank. There was no intention by Anthony or Nikki to throw away the food. But, there was John who would not allow them to eat. In this family everything happened as per John’s command, and to be fair his decisions were not good for the family’s current state. He was reckless to quit his job and to add to the misery he got drunk every day, ruining thanksgiving.”

“After few more seconds, John rushed towards Anthony to snatch the plate. But, Nikki was quicker and she stopped him midway.”

““John, if you try to throw the food that has been delivered to us on thanksgiving, I swear to God I will leave you and take the children with me”, said Nikki taking a stand against John who was crueller than ever.”

“He tried to shove Nikki to the side with his sheer strength, but failed to do so because of the high amount of alcohol in his body. The two boys stood behind their mother and supported her stand. They held her by the shoulder signalling John that he was outnumbered. ”

“John was angry and upset, and watching his family turn against him, he left the house in a fit of rage and slammed the door shut. Nikki stood there immovable for the next few seconds. She finally breathed a sigh of relief that nobody was hurt.”

“The main reasons that prompted John to leave at that moment were three things- the food that is delivered is charity, it means that he is worthless and he has to leave his family. So, without further ado, kicking up the dust, John set out on his own journey. That was the last time the rest of them saw John. The situation was the same but the decision made by Anthony on the other hand was different. I would like to point this out- The ability to think and reason differently under similar circumstances is the unique characteristic of a human. Anthony thought otherwise, the first thing he thought of was that they had food. That was the best thing that anyone could have provided, to him and his family at that point of time. The second thing that he thought of was that even in this dog eat dog world, there was someone who actually cared about someone else and didn’t want anything in return. It made him believe that strangers care. The third thing he thought of was that if somebody cared about him, then he should do the same and that he will make a difference in his life.”

“Anthony grew up without his father for the rest of his life and at the age of seventeen, he gathered enough money to feed two families at thanksgiving. That was the most moving and humbling experiences of his life. It brought solace and peace of mind and the best part was that he loved it. He didn’t even tell anybody or even asked for help. He just did it, because strangers care. The following year, he assembled enough money to feed four families doubling the number every year henceforth. This went on for many years and after decades into helping others, Anthony along with his foundation fed more than four million people in hundred different countries on festivals and holidays.”

The next moment I could sense the self-realization that was overwhelming few of my students. That brought me to my question- “What is your ambition in life?” But before I did that, I wanted them to take a moment and understand the meaning of the story. It is very important that children grasp the meaning of the story; else the entire story remains unimportant. I took a quick glance at the faces- some were perplexed, some were happy and some were waiting for me to talk. I took some more seconds before I finally spoke.

“So, what do you think about the story? Now is the time for my question.”

I once again saw those exiting eyes and felt happy.

But, before I could say anything the school bell rang, signalling the end of the academic day. I wanted to ask my question but the children were in a hurry to leave. The entire school burst out shouting and running for the exit. I didn’t want to stop them from going home, so I postponed my question to yet another boring second half class.

I felt bad that nobody wanted to listen to the question at the end of the story. Everybody was in a hurry to go home. This made me realise that school is such a burden on the children. They are only looking to pass the time whilst they are here. Hopefully the next day would be a better day.

I gathered my text book and decided to leave when I saw Sandeep approaching me. He stood determined and resolute.

“What happened Sandeep, is everything all right?”

“Sir before this class I didn’t know what to do. But now, I want to be like Anthony Robbins.”

(P.S: Anthony Robbins is an American life coach, self-help author and motivational speaker. He has spoken at Harvard Business School and was ranked by the school among the “Top 200 Business Gurus” (Harvard Business School Press, 2003). In 2007, he was named to Forbes magazine's "Celebrity 100" list. Forbes estimated that Robbins earned approximately $30 million USD in that year.)